The works

Conservatives are inherently awful, liberals just happen to be awful as well.

I had this idea come to me just before I fell asleep, and I decided in my sleepiness that it must have been a brilliant idea and I had to write it down.  But now I’m not sure if it’s brilliant or if I just think it is because I was about to fall asleep when I had it.

Peace is to happiness as chewing gum is to catching fish.

I am fascinated by the concept of a supernatural ability to read minds.  Obviously I would know whether I am capable of something like this or not, but how would i know if somebody else is?  Surely I’d hear about it on the news right?  Not so fast my friend!  I know if I could do something like that I would never tell anyone about it.  So how would I gain such knowledge?  I have decided that every time I encounter a person I will think “I’m going to rape the shit out of you.”  I will not change facial expressions, I will obviously be looking their direction so they know I’m thinking about them, and when they recoil in disgust I will know their secret! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA